Tenth Week

So here it is! The eleventh Week! The last week of lecture phase! After this? Outreach all the time in San Francisco, but before we go to that I'm here to say some things about what's been happening in the tenth week. We had our DTS Director, Steven Binnquist talks for Monday and Tuesday, and then we have one of the staff here, Ruthie Kim, to talk.

Steven focused more about the unity of our group and how he felt that the group is slowly being individualistic. I think it's true, because I was convicted by God that I've been trying to isolate myself from other people thinking what's the point of building relationship when I'm not going to see them again. It was something I struggle with for the last two weeks, but it's been better now. I'm trying to get outside and invest to other people, because it turns out that God brought all of us here to be a blessing to each other and if I don't try to get to know people, I'll be missing out on God's blessing. It was even more true when one of our friends had a vision that we're all walking our individual path. In that vision I can see myself as the one being left behind because I don't want anybody with me.

We confessed what we're struggling and I did also. At first I don't want people to know what I'm struggling with because I don't want to burden them, but that perspective soon change. I should let this family of mine knows what I'm struggling with because we'll be walking together and instead of giving my burden to them, we'll pick up each other's burden. That's what family is all about. I'm trying to do a one-on-one with the girls, because it just seems that I barely know anything about them. It's good to know what they're struggling with because it helps me what to pray about.

The scary thing about Wednesday was that Ruthie was talking about how we should stay together as a group and stop walking individually. She didn't even know what we talked about on Monday and Tuesday. It really is from God that He wants us to be united and be transparent to each other.

Ruthie also talked about the life of David. We were looking at the part of David and his sin with Bathsheba. I asked myself why does God leave Saul who sins merely for disobeying and He stays with David when he committed adultery, murdered someone's husband, and be a hypocrite. It just doesn't make sense to me, until I realized that David has the heart of repentance. Not just a normal repenting saying, "Lord forgive me. I won't do it again." That's good too, but David repented like it was the end of the world. He mourned and cried for his sin. He truly repented. It might go something like this: "Oh Lord... I've sinned greatly against You. I'm not worthy to be called Your servant. I'm truly sorry that I've disappointed You. I just ask that You would forgive me and that You would just clean my slate and helped as the days go that You will give me the strength to overcome my temptations." David's repentance is genuine. It's not just an act. He lives it out.

I'm currently rereading the 1 Samuel and 2 Samuel and 1 Kings and 2 Kings. I really want to learn more about David in depth. It seems there's much more than just war and a man after God's own heart. I want to know why he's called a man after God's own heart.

Ministry was stagnant this week. The weather has been cloudy or raining and it's hard to get out the building. We had a community night this friday and it's basically a brief worship night in the building and everybody is welcome. It also gives representation of what YWAM San Francisco has to offer.

I've been learning a lot and I can't wait for outreach already. So much people to be loved. I'm still asking God to break my heart for these people. I just want a compassion for these people. It's still a work in progress, but I can honestly say that I've been willing to change.

Thank you for all the support and prayers. It's been great knowing people back at home is praying for me. I really appreciate it. It's been a good emotional support for me. I thank you once again. I also would love it if you guys have any prayer request. I'll gladly pray for you and intercede. Keep praying for me and have a blessed week.